This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. A person with a partner who avoids conflict is more likely to continue a dispute because they have not had an opportunity to discuss their grievances. If it benefits the relationship, then it might be worth working on whats not so good. However, people in abusive relationships will need to take different steps. A person can let the other person know how they feel by using I statements. When someone gives you the silent treatment, it's easy to get thrown off-balance. The goal is to identify any issues and find ways to solve them, rather than placing blame. If you arent necessarily in a close relationship with the person who is giving you the silent treatment, you may be able to just move on and act like nothing happened. Your California Privacy Rights / Privacy Policy. A teacher. If someone is using the silent treatment on you, Wright said, it's important to find ways to emotionally regulate yourself. Impact of Silent Treatment in Relationships - Verywell Mind Most of us know what it's like to be hurt by words the cruel ones, the insensitive ones, the ones that replay themselves over and over again in our minds. This would be especially handy for couples new to the marriage counseling scene. Its coming from a place of punishment, not a need to cool off or regroup. Another reason your partner(s) might employ silent treatment, albeit incorrectly, is that you have yet to figure out how to communicate correctly. Why The Silent Treatment Equates to Emotional Abuse Now, their partners might take the silent treatment route because they feel like they're never heard. In relationships between adults, he says, no matter the reason behind the behavior, the person on the receiving end is going to feel dejected, isolated, angry, and/or confused. Watch this video for ideas for setting boundaries in friendships and relationships: This might be quite the ask, as we are requesting that you validate the feelings of someone that is currently hurting you. "That, along with planning a time to come back together to discuss further, can help the relationship in the long run," she notes. In cases like this, it is best to respect their decision. A person should not apologize or blame themselves for another persons use of the silent treatment, as the silence is how their partner chooses to respond. It rears its head in other relationships, even in the workplace, and causes the affected party to second guess all their decisions. If you feel you need help, you can get out of this relationship and move on to a better situation. The silent treatment easily becomes abuse to the other party when it negatively affects their self-esteem. You can avoid the silent treatment by compassionately acknowledging what you're feeling. The psychological effects of the silent treatment can be far-reaching. If they fear that an argument will be started by voicing their opinion, then they might just shut down. How to handle to the silent treatment once and for all The issue lies only with the abusive person. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Learning Mind is a blog created by Anna LeMind, B.A., with the purpose to give you food for thought and solutions for understanding yourself and living a more meaningful life. Psychologists say that when it becomes part of a pattern of controlling or punishing behavior, it can be abusive. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously. Aronson Fontes, L. (2019). According to Narcissist Abuse Report, parents often use this tactic with their children when they are trying to gain control of a situation and cannot handle it. It can be snarky comments that make communication difficult or break down communication. Is silent treatment a form of abuse? This person may be a counselor, relative, or friend. Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors. Selfish people care for themselves over others and when something doesnt go their way, they ignore others to make a statement. The silent treatment is a refusal to communicate verbally with another person. Fight the urge to escalate the matter. Essentially, the silent treatment is a noxious (non)communication tactic that is often meant to exert emotion control over someone else through sowing doubt, confusion, and anxiety. When it becomespart of a pattern of behavior, Wright said it can be abusive, especially when it includes other harmful behaviors such as threats or insults, when the intention is to control. Look out for one or more of the signs above to help decide if it constitutes abuse or not. Power of Positivity uses cookies to give you the most relevant experience. The first step to dealing with receiving the silent treatment from someone is to face it head-on and start a conversation. Silence is used as a weapon to cut off meaningful . As I listened, the question that lingered most was How could these people do this to those closest to them? Medical News Today have compiled five tips backed by specialists and research to help, Some signs of emotional abuse include controlling, shaming, blaming, and purposely humiliating another person. The problem with the silent treatment is that it hurts-emotionally.